


Heroes of the Resistance: Dr. Marie Lebeau - Wounded Warriors

by brickhousewriter



Series: Heroes of the Resistance [5]
Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Adult Language, Family Angst, Gen, I write close-canon fic, In Canon Character Death, This is a Ship-Free zone (unless you’re Gipsy Danger whacking a Kaiju), This is mostly original characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-28
Updated: 2014-03-28
Packaged: 2018-01-17 07:06:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1378327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brickhousewriter/pseuds/brickhousewriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You can’t have a war movie without a medical corps to take care of your soldiers.  Dr. Marie Lebeau has been with the PPDC since the beginning.  She’s known Stacker Pentecost and Hercules Hansen since they were Mark-1 test pilots.  So when the Kaiju war is in its final days, counting down to when Pentecost kicks off Operation Pitfall, she’s still right there to support her friends, in any way she can.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heroes of the Resistance: Dr. Marie Lebeau - Wounded Warriors

**Author's Note:**

> For me Pacific Rim had the same vibe as a WWII movie. Not just the bomber jackets and the international cast, but that “We’re all in this together for the greater good.” feeling that most WWII movies capture. Except that you can’t have a war movie without a medical corps. One of the odd things about the movie for me was that even though we have wounded warriors, there is no sign of the doctors and nurses who patch them up and send them back out into the field.
> 
> Maybe I spent too many hours watching M*A*S*H* in my youth, but the first original character I created for my Pacific Rim stories was Dr. Marie Lebeau. In my head canon the triumvirate at the core of the PPDC consists of Stacker Pentecost, Hercules Hansen, and Marie Lebeau. The three of them have been involved in all aspects of the Jaeger program: from development of the PONS neural interface, Mark-1 testing, teaching at Jaeger Academy, serving as Rangers, to running the Shatterdomes.
> 
> This story contains brief quotes from both the movie and the novelization. Scene one is from the deleted scenes on the DVD and BluRay. The characters and dialog from Pacific Rim are copyright Travis Beacham and Legendary Pictures. No copyright infringement intended. It also briefly references events and characters from two other stories in this series, [Transfer of Power](http://archiveofourown.org/works/991752), and [EMP](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1008309).

### Prologue - January 2005

_Hercules Hansen walked out of the Marshall’s office to discover his son Chuck in a fist-fight with Raleigh Becket.  It was pretty clear that the fight was already over. Chuck was on the floor and Becket was on top of him, with Chuck’s arm in a control move. Herc knew how much that was going to piss off Chuck, his son hated losing, especially to anyone that he considered an inferior. The Marshall called off Becket, but Herc had to physically restrain Chuck while Pentecost ordered Becket into his office. After Chuck stormed off, Hansen had a quiet word in the hallway with Stacker, apologized for his boy’s behavior, then went looking for his son. He checked in Medical, even though he didn’t really expect to find Chuck there, then he tried their quarters, and the Mess Hall. His next stop was Scramble Alley, where he finally found Chuck, banging away in one of the maintenance sheds._

_Chuck barely looked at his father, “Hydraulics are shot. We need to replace ‘em.”_

_Herc turned down the radio that was blasting. “He’s uh, he’s grounded Mako.”   Herc knew that Chuck knew Mako from the Academy, they’d been there at the same time, but it dawned on him that he had no idea if his son and Stacker’s daughter had been friends or not._

_“Good.” Chuck turned the radio back up even louder. “That’s half the right decision, but I want Becket off this mission more than I’ve ever wanted anything.” He crossed the shed and picked up a drill, brandishing it like a pistol._

_Herc turned the music off._

_“I’m listening to that.”_

_Herc looked at his son. “Who are you?” How could this possibly be the laughing child that he and Maggie had brought into this world? How could that smiling little boy have turned into this angry young man?_

_“Excuse me?”_

_“I don’t even recognize you mate. Who are you?”_

_“Who am I? What do you mean?”_

_Herc stepped closer to Chuck “You’re a great Ranger. Is that what you wanna hear? Everybody knows that.”_

_“Well what more do you want me to be?”_

_Herc exploded, “A better person!”_

_“A better person?” Chuck snorted and started to walk away. Then he paused and shot back over his shoulder, “Well you know what? At least you can’t blame yourself. Because you didn’t raise me to be anything. You know, after mum died I spent more time with these machines than I ever did with you. You know the only reason you and I even speak anymore old man is because we’re Drift compatible. We’re good at smashing things up, you and I. You know what? We don’t even need to speak at all. I’ll catch you in the Drift. Dad.”_

**********

Herc stood there, watching his son stalk away across the floor of the maintenance bay. It was only a matter of time before Chuck mouthed off to the wrong person and got himself grounded. Herc couldn’t afford that, not with Pentecost planning to kick off Operation Pitfall any day now. He’d have to talk to the boy later, after he’d had a chance to cool off a bit. He’d already lost one co-pilot to bad behavior; he didn’t want to lose a second. Not at this stage in his career. And not at this stage in the war.

His son was too much like his younger brother Scott: reckless, impulsive, undisciplined. Maybe it had been a mistake after all, taking on Chuck as his co-pilot. He sighed, the tension draining from his body now that his son was out of sight. Herc also knew that, just like with his brother, that recklessness was part of what made him so Drift compatible with his son. Herc was the thinker, the strategist, Scott and Chuck were the ones driven to take action. The combination made them better fighters than they would have been working alone.

Herc sighed again, remembering that trip back to Jaeger Academy in 2019, after Scott has been discharged and he’d been forced to look for a new co-pilot if he wanted to stay a Ranger. He hadn’t been back to the Proving Grounds since he and Scott had been deployed in _Lucky Seven_. It had been three years since he’d walked the halls of the Kodiak Island facility. Since he’d left the test pilot program and graduated to full Ranger status he and Scott had run missions all over southeast Asia, had bagged a number of Kaiju kills, and somehow managed to become media darlings even though Herc tried to avoid giving interviews. Scot had been more than willing to talk to the press; he’d enjoyed the limelight, the attention. Then he’d started to believe his own press about how the _Lucky Seven_ team could do no wrong. And it had been his downfall. Scott had managed to violate the Ranger code in a manner that had not only gotten him permanently grounded, but drummed out of the Corps too.

They’d been warned at the Academy that there were no secrets in the Drift. And once Herc knew what his brother had done, he’d had to report it. It had eaten him up, having to make that decision and knowing what it would mean for his brother. But he knew there was no way he could live with himself, and no way he could continue to share Drift space with his brother, once he knew what Scott had done. Herc knew he had done the right thing. But that didn’t make him feel any better, didn’t make the knot in his stomach any less, didn’t make it any easier to sleep at night. Herc was already feeling down on himself when the transport landed in Alaska. And that feeling didn’t get any better when he realized that this was the first time he’d visited Chuck since he shipped his son off to school.

Oh, Chuck had come back home on vacations, but somehow Herc had never managed to find time to go visit his son, not even after Chuck had been admitted to the Academy as one of the youngest candidates ever. He’d always been too busy with his duties as a Ranger. But now he stood in the doorway of one of the observation decks Jaeger Academy, wearing the dress uniform of a Jaeger pilot, and it wasn’t even to see his son. It was because he was desperately hoping he could find a new co-pilot so he could keep fighting Kaiju. Because that was all he knew how to do. He’d spent his life as a soldier, and fighting was just about all he was good at.

He’d hoped to find the Commandant, or maybe his old friend from his test pilot days Stacker Pentecost, now an instructor at the Academy. But the observation deck was empty except for a lone figure with a clipboard, watching the students going through their paces in the Field House below through the large plate glass window. The trim figure belonged to Dr. Marie Lebeau, Chief Medical Officer for both Jaeger Academy and the nearby Anchorage Shatterdome.

Dr. Lebeau had been with the Jaeger program since the beginning. A Marine surgeon, she had develop a side specialization in treating stress disorders in combat veterans. So when she heard that the newly formed Pan Pacific Defense Corps was looking for medical professionals to research the mind-body connection for the Jaeger program, she resigned her commission in the Marines Corps and volunteered. She had been one of the first medical doctors hired to work with Dr. Jasper Schoenfeld and Dr. Caitlin Lightcap on the Jaeger development project. She and her husband Pierre moved from California to the research station at Kodiak Island. By the time the Jaeger Academy opened nine months later, she had been appointed Chief Medical Officer for the entire research and training facility.

Marie wore the PPDC uniform like she was born to it. But then again, she practically had been. She came from a military family, and had been a Marine for decades before joining the PPDC.   Herc on the other hand, despite his long career as a soldier, hated his dress blues. He always felt uncomfortable when he had to pull out the spit and polish. He vastly preferred the broken-in comfort of his basic duty uniform. He tugged at his collar. He hated wearing a tie.

As Herc fussed with his uniform, Dr. Lebeau turned around and spotted him standing in the doorway. “Herc, what are you doing here?” She looked surprised to see him. She rushed across the room and gave him a warm hug. “You should have told us you were coming! I haven’t seen you since you got assigned to _Lucky Seven_.” He supposed he deserved that, he hadn’t exactly made the effort to keep in touch with his old friends either once he’d gotten his Jaeger. Training, patrols, deployments, and Jaeger maintenance had become his whole life.

“I was hoping to see Stacker.” His voice was rough from lack of use. When was the last time he’d talked to someone?

“He’s over at the Shatterdome. He doesn’t spend much time at the Academy since he made Marshall.”

“Oh, that’s right. I’d heard he got promoted.”

“You really are out of touch, aren’t you Herc?” Marie squinted at him. “When did that happen? You two used to talk all the time. Have you had a falling out?”

“No, no nothing like that. Just busy.” He scrubbed his hand over his hair. He’d gotten it cut for the trip. Had to keep up appearances when he wasn’t in a Jaeger. “Things have been a little crazy…”

“I was sorry to hear about Scott. What’s the status of the investigation?”

Herc was surprised that the doctor hadn’t heard the news yet. Usually Marie Lebeau had her ear to the ground and knew the latest PPDC gossip before anyone else in the Shatterdome.   Herc often teased her that she hadn’t been a surgeon, but a spy in her former career. But she was too good a doctor for that to have actually been the case. However, she did have a large circle of friends and former patients who kept her informed on goings on inside and outside the Corps. Maybe she just hadn’t cultivated a spy inside the closed door, classified hearings where the PPDC had decided the fate of his brother.

“It’s a bit of a long story…”

“Why don’t you come back to my office and tell me all about it? The Commandant’s off-site today anyway, I think he’s at a meeting over at the assembly plant in Anchorage. And now that I think about it, I’m pretty sure Stacker flew over with him.”

The doctor led the way down the familiar corridors to her office. When they were test pilots, back in the early days, Herc and Stacker had spent endless hours in the Medical wing, their bodies covered with sensors and test harnesses as the brilliant minds of the Jaeger program created the PONS system for the first prototype Jaegers.

The doctor pointed towards the lumpy couch along one wall. “Have a seat.” As he seated himself, she pulled open the bottom drawer in her desk and pulled out a bottle labeled simply _Scotch_. “Drink? It’s the good stuff, not the PPDC swill. I only use the bottle to throw people off.”

“I could use one.” She poured them both two fingers, handed him a glass, leaned back against her desk and took a sip from her own.

“So what are you doing here Herc? It’s been a long time.”

“I need a new co-pilot.”

“So they grounded Scott huh? I kinda figured as much. Nobody’s saying what he did, but scuttlebutt was that it was bad.”

“It’s classified, I can’t talk about the details.”

“Understood.”

Herc tossed back the Scotch, then held out the glass towards Marie. She poured him two more fingers, and this time he cradled the glass in his hands.

“All I ever wanted to do was serve, to be a pilot.” He sighed. “My brother? Scott wanted to be famous. He loved being a Ranger, the press interviews, the groupies, the talk shows. I wasn’t interested in it, but he ate that shit up. So I let him do the talking, I handed him the phone numbers the Jaeger groupies shoved in my pockets. I let him deal with anyone who wanted a photo op or a favor.

I was a fool. I should have known that he didn’t have the discipline to keep his personal and professional life separate. That he’d eventually start believing his own press about how we were invulnerable and capable of anything we put our minds to. I should have known to keep an eye on him, keep him out of trouble. Scott was always a wildcard, and I forgot that.

The problem with being Drift compatible with someone is they can’t keep secrets from you. I can’t tell you what he did Marie, but I can tell you that once I knew, I _had_ to report him. I didn’t have any choice.”

He paused, noticed the Scotch still in his glass, and gulped it down.

“They pulled us both from the field. I’ve been stuck behind a desk for months while they investigated the charges. It’s killing me, shuffling papers while _Lucky Seven_ sits idle. And we’d just conducted the first field test for _Striker Eureka_ , first of the Mark-5s. This was such lousy timing. They were going to reassign us to _Striker_ when she launched.  And damn she’s a sweet ride.” Herc couldn’t stop himself from grinning. Piloting the new Jaeger, feeling the raw power of her Supercell energy core vibrating through her muscle strands when he was linked to her via the neural handshake, had been a physical rush that had felt almost as sweet as sex.

“They’re going to give Scott a dishonorable discharge for conduct unbecoming an officer. As long as he quietly disappears, he’ll stay out of prison. I don’t know how they’re going to spin that in the press, probably that he’s retiring for health reasons or something.”

“So far there hasn’t been much in the press at all.”

“The PPDC put a press blackout on it.”

“Ah, that explains it.” Marie nodded.

“What happens to Scott now isn’t my problem. My problem is finding another co-pilot. I’m damn lucky that the investigation cleared me of any charges. Since I’ve agreed not to talk about any of the gory details, I get to keep my position as a Ranger. But the PPDC isn’t sure if they’re going to assign me to _Striker Eureka_ after all. Not unless I can find a pilot that I Drift with as well as I did with Scott. I need a new co-pilot Marie, that’s why I’m here. And after the scandal, I’m not sure if anyone is going to want to pair up with me.”

“Herc, any one of the current students would jump at the chance to share a Conn-Pod with the great Hercules Hansen.” She thought for a moment, “The problem is, if Scott’s transgression is classified like you said, it’s going to be touchy for you, Drifting with someone else.”

“I’ve got better mental discipline when I’m in Drift space than Scott ever did. But just in case, I cut a deal with the PPDC. Anyone that I agree is Drift compatible with me will be read in on what happened, so it won’t matter. Can you help me Marie? Do you still do the student evals?”

The doctor considered the Ranger sitting on her couch. Then she drained the glass in her hand and said, “I think we’ve got our work cut out for us.”

Dr. Lebeau had her orderly pull the files for every senior cadet who had graduated from Ranger Ready to Drive Suit Testing. They spent hours poring over student files, occasionally calling in a candidate to interview with Herc. Finally Dr. Lebeau dropped the file in her hands and leaned back in her chair, stretching shoulders that had cramped up from sitting in one position too long.

“Good God Herc, look at the time. We’ve been at this for hours. No wonder my stomach’s growling, we completely missed lunch hours in the commissary.” She opened the bottom drawer in her desk and dug around. “Here.” She tossed a ration bar at Herc, who caught it neatly. “I keep a box of these in my desk for emergencies.

“Thanks Marie.” He peeled back the label and took a bite. “They’re just as foul as I remember. Taste like sawdust.”

“But with balanced nutrition.” She wrinkled her nose as she took a bite too. “There’s a reason they’re only for emergencies. But I don’t think I’ll last until dinner without something to eat.” She pulled two bottles of water out of the drawer and handed one across to Herc. “See anyone that seems like a likely candidate?”

“They’re all fine young men and women Marie, but I’m just not feeling it. I doubt that I’d be Drift Compatible with any of them.”

Lebeau didn’t question his judgment. One of the unsolved mysteries of the Jaeger Program was how pilots knew when they were Drift compatible with each other. She and Caitlin Lightcap had been studying the phenomenon for years, and the best anyone could explain it to them was it was a _feeling_ , knowing they could trust someone, a vibe, a look in their eyes. They’d found that candidates who weren’t Drift compatible often didn’t have that instant “click” when they met new people. But Drift compatible candidates seemed to have a sixth sense for sizing people up the moment they met them.

Veteran pilots, ones who had actually jockeyed in a Jaeger and not just in simulators, had an even more uncanny ability to pick Drift compatible partners out of a crowd. They’d lost a few pilots over the years due to injuries, illness, or death, and when the surviving partner chose to stay in the program, they often only had to be in the same room as their new partner to know they’d be Drift compatible.

Lebeau had a private theory that it had something to do with some as yet undiscovered sixth sense that was stronger with pilots than with non-pilots. But she had no evidence to back up her near-ESP theory, so she tended to keep it to herself.

Her musing were interrupted when Herc announced, “I need to take a break. Where’s the nearest head?”

Dr. Lebeau waved at the other door in her office. “I’ve got my own. You’re welcome to it.” Herc disappeared behind the door.

There was a knock on the outer office door. “Enter.” Dr. Lebeau called.

Her orderly stuck his head in the door. “There’s a Cadet here asking to see you m’am.”

“Who is it?”

“Cadet Hansen m’am.”

Marie waved permission at him, “Show him in.”

Cadet Charles “Chuck” Hansen walked into the room like he owned it. Dr. Lebeau had always been surprised at how self-assured the young man was despite his extreme youth. Most of the cadets at Jaeger Academy where college age or, if they’d had previous military experience, even a bit older. Chuck had needed a dispensation from the Commandant in order to enroll, he’d been only fifteen years old when he entered the Academy last fall. And he wouldn’t be turning sixteen until August.

“What can I do for you Cadet?” Despite the fact that their families were old friends, when Chuck had enrolled, she’d insisted on treating him exactly the same as every other cadet, even when they were in private. Chuck had bristled at her treatment of him as just another student, but after a few very public dressing downs, he’d finally accepted that he wasn’t going to get any favors from the doctor just because his father was a Mark-1 test pilot and Ranger and had know the doctor since the old days. She wondered if he even knew his father was on campus.

“M’am.” He nodded at her, at least he hadn’t forgotten her rank, “Scuttlebutt has it there’s a Ranger on site, doing interviews, looking for a new co-pilot. I was hoping to get a chance to talk to him.” He realized his error, swallowed, and quickly corrected himself. “Or her.”

“You know you’re not supposed to listen to scuttlebutt Cadet. Loose lips sink ships.”

“But m’am! You don’t understand. I _have_ to get a slot in a Jaeger. I just have to. My dad’s a Ranger…”

“I know who your father is Cadet. We’ve had this conversation before.” She shot Chuck a warning look. Now was not the time for Chuck to try to pull some imaginary rank granted on him by virtue of being Herc’s son.

“But Dr. Lebeau, he never comes to see me and he never writes. And maybe if I were a Ranger too, I could get assigned to the same Shatterdome and he’d respect me because I was a Ranger just like him.” It all came out in a rush, and as soon as it was out of his mouth, Chuck flushed furiously. Marie realized that he’d probably slipped up and told the honest truth for once. She wondered just how long it had been since father and son had actually talked. But before she could ask, Chuck had his mask back in place. And behind the closed door, there was the sound of a toilet flushing. Chuck’s eyes went big when he heard the sound of running water. Then the door opened, and Hercules Hansen came out of the head.

Chuck stared at him for a few seconds, “Da, is that you?”

“Hullo son.” Marie noticed that he didn’t call him by name, or approach his son. She wondered if it was just surprise at seeing Chuck, or if there was something else going on between father and son?

“What are you _doing_ here?”

“Your Uncle Scott went and got himself grounded.”

“ _You’re_ the Ranger looking for a partner?”

“I am.”

“How long have you been here?” Chuck was starting to sound angry.

“I flew in around 0730 this morning.”

“You’ve been here all day?”

Herc looked at the clock on the wall. It read 1630. “I guess I have.”

“Were you even going to bother coming to see me?”

“I was planning to see you son. But I ran into Dr. Lebeau, and we got to talking, and then just got started reviewing candidates. I guess we lost track of time. We must have worked straight through lunch.”

“No, I mean,” Chuck ran both hands through his hair, “Why wasn’t _I_ your first choice for a co-pilot?”

Herc looked startled at the very idea. “You’re my boy. I wanted to keep you safe.”

“But you sent me to the Academy!” Chuck shouted.

“Best place for you. Surrounded by Rangers, right next door to a Shatterdome. Can’t think of a safer place for you than here with Stacker and Marie to keep an eye on you.”

“I am not some child that needs looking after!”

“You’re my child, and I wanted to keep you safe. Not have you get killed by a Kaiju while I wasn’t around to look after you myself.”

“I can take care of myself. Not that you were ever around to take care of me.”

“I’ve done the best I could since your mother died…”

“Well, you’ve done a piss poor job of it old man.” Chuck turned on his heel and stormed out of the office.

“Dismissed Cadet.” Marie muttered after him as he left.

Herc sunk back down on the couch. “I’m sorry you had to see that Marie.”

“Well, you probably _should_ have visited your son before you went looking for the Commandant.  How long has it been since you two have seen each other?”

Herc looked thoughtful. “Last school vacation? No, wait, I had a drop, had to send him home with one of his classmates. So maybe Christmas?”

“That’s a long time Herc. And he’s young. You’re the only family he’s got. He needs to see you.”

“I know…. Still, doesn’t excuse his behavior.”

“No, no it doesn’t. But for your sake, I’ll consider this a family argument, and pretend that I didn’t just witness a Ranger Candidate be rude to two superior officers and then storm off without being dismissed.”

“Appreciate it Marie.”

The doctor picked up the ration bar she’d put down when her orderly knocked and took a bite off it. She chewed thoughtfully, while Herc went back to shuffling through the pile of student folders on the coffee table in front of him. He sorted through the stack of files and pulled a new one out. He read through it for a couple of minutes before putting it back down with a thump.

“What about Chuck?”

“What?”

“How’s my son doing?” he pointed to the open file. “It looks like his scores are good.” Chuck had been one of the youngest candidates ever accepted to the Jaeger Academy.   His father had had to call in a number of favors to get the Commandant to overlook not only his son’s age, but the fact that he’d already been kicked out of a series of boarding schools. Herc had hoped that the rigors of the Academy would teach his son some self-discipline. Although if his behavior this afternoon was any indication, it hadn’t.   Herc knew that Marie was one of the handful of senior officers whose duty it was to evaluate each candidate as they made their way through each stage of the Ranger training. She’d evaluated Herc when he’d gone through the Academy. He tapped the folder, “Tell me what’s not in this file.”

“He waltzed through the first two weeks of Basic like it was nothing. Then passed Ranger Ready with flying colors. Your boy’s in top physical shape. He’s the current male champion for his class in the Kwoon Combat Room. He’s got top scores in the simulators during drivesuit testing. And he’s a brilliant mechanic.”

“But?” Herc could tell there was a “but” in there somewhere.

Marie picked up her water bottle and took a long drink. It was a delaying tactic, to give her time to think about how to tell him the next part.

“Herc, there’s a good chance he’s going to wash out of the program.  I’m scheduled to evaluate him next week to decide if he graduates to Drift Sync Testing or not. But even if I pass him, if none of the other students agrees to Drift with him, he’s not going to advance any further as a Ranger Candidate.”

“What? How can he wash out if he’s top of his class?”

“He’s angry. Volatile. Unpredictable. Your son has made more enemies than friends during his time at the Academy. The next stage of the program is Drift Sync Training, and quite frankly, nobody in his class is willing to try a test Drift with him. I’ve never had so many students ask me if Drift partners are assigned or if they get to choose their own as I have this year. I’m sorry to have to tell you that nobody likes or trusts your son enough to want to share head space with him. ”

Herc sat staring down at the file in front of him for a long moment before he finally lifted his head and asked, “Marie, what if we could Drift together? We’re blood relatives, doesn’t that mean that we should be Drift compatible?”

“You know we don’t yet fully understand what makes two people Drift compatible. But since he’s your son, I’d be surprised if you weren’t. We’ve had good success with family members Drifting together.”  

“Would you let him continue in the program?”

“Drifting with you?”

“Yes.”

“That’s not entirely my call to make. It’s up to the Commandant. He’s the one who has final sign off on which students advance to the next level of training. We’d have to convince him. And Chuck’s not even sixteen yet, that’s awfully young for a combat slot. I hate to think we’ve reached the point where we send children out to fight Kaiju. If Chuck were to graduate Drift Sync Training with a partner, Command would assign the two of them to officer slots for a couple of years, to give him time to mature, before they even thought about assigning him to a Jaeger.”

“But he’d be fighting with me. Surely that should count for something.”

The doctor had looked thoughtful, “We could make the argument that pairing him with an experienced veteran pilot would be a good way to reign him in. Teach him control.”

“Marie, he’s my boy, he’s all I’ve got left.”

The doctor put her hand on his knee, “I know Herc. But I’ve got to think about what’s best for everyone here. Not just you, but Chuck too. And the program. Let me sleep on it.”

**********

Herc cleaned up the tools that Chuck had left out, then talked to Big Luke about replacing the damaged hydraulics in _Striker Eureka_. Then he went looking for his son.

Instead of Chuck, he bumped into Dr. Lebeau, now Chief Medical Officer of the Hong Kong Shatterdome, in the hallway.   “What’s this I hear about a brawl?” Marie asked.

“I wouldn’t call it a brawl. Chuck got into it with Becket is all.”

“And he walked away?”

“What do you mean?”

“I haven’t seen him down in Medical, that’s surprising. Back when they were first at the Academy the Becket boys put several students in the infirmary. I’m glad to see that Raleigh’s finally learning some restraint.”

“I wish Chuck had. That boy has a mouth on him.”

“What’d he do now?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Come on, I’ll make you a cup of coffee.”

“I can’t drink that mud.”

“Not the stuff from the Mess. You know Pierre makes sure I’ve got the good stuff.” She winked at him, “There are advantages to being married to the Supply Chief you know. You should come by for dinner some night. Pierre would love to see you again.”

“Ah, we’d just end up drinking your beer and talking about old times.”

“Pierre would love that! He hasn’t had anyone to talk to about the “good old days” since Albert retired last year.”

“I’d like that Marie.”

“You can bring Chuck if you like. We’d love to see him too.”

Herc sighed. “I’m beginning to regret my decision to make the boy a Ranger.”

“Herc, don’t.” She put her hand on his arm. “He’s young and he’s angry. He needs an outlet for all that anger. At least he’s directing it at Kaiju and not people. Well, most of the time.”

“Yeah, I guess there’s that. Although he’s been directing it at me lately.”

“He’s here where we can both keep an eye on him. And you can keep him out of trouble.”

“Not bloody likely.”

***

“ _Movement in the Breach. Two Kaiju signatures, category four_.” The calm voice of the computer broadcast over the public address system. The announcement could be heard everywhere inside and outside the Shatterdome. All the Rangers reported to LOCCENT to receive their orders. The experienced teams had already suited up. Unsure of their status, the rookie pairing of Becket and Mako were still in their duty uniforms.

“ _Crimson Typhoon_ , _Cherno Alpha_ , I want you to front line the harbor. Stay on the Miracle Mile. _Striker_ , I want you to stay back and look after the coastline. We cannot afford to lose you. So only engage as a final option.”

“Yes Sir.” Herc and Chuck answered in unison. Herc was surprised by that. It was almost as if they were already Drifting. They usually required the neural bridge to sync up like that.

Pentecost turned to Beckett and Mori, “You two, you stay put. Let’s go!” He clapped his hands and everyone turned towards their duty stations as the Rangers headed towards their Jaegers.

Herc and Chuck didn’t speak as they walked the corridors. Father and son were still furious with each other. They were silent as their crew strapped them into the control harness, speaking only briefly as they went through their pre-launch checks. Herc wasn’t looking forward to sharing head space with his son today. Not after his fight with Raleigh and the argument they’d had earlier. Chuck’s anger could be overwhelming. It took all of Herc’s mental strength to channel it into the Jaeger, leaving him exhausted at the end of most of their missions. He wondered how much longer he could keep this up. And if anyone else had noticed.

“Prepare for neural handshake. Starting in three, two… one…” Tendo Choi’s calm voice came through the speakers. Herc threw up his mental shields, but not in time to avoid the wash of anger that came through the neural link from his son. Herc felt the sudden overwhelming urge to hit something. There were two Kaiju somewhere in the harbor, he’d really like the chance to get in a couple of punches before the day was over. The question was, would he get the chance?

“LOCCENT, _Striker_ ’s got the ball and we’re on the roll.” Chuck called in as they strode across the harbor.

Herc triggered the comms system, “LOCCENT, near positions and awaiting your orders.”

“Remain in the Miracle Mile and engage at your discretion.”

“Yes sir.” Herc and Chuck stopped just before the heads up display showed them at the line that marked one mile from shore. There was nothing to do now but wait. And Herc knew that his son was very bad at waiting. As the Kaiju surged out of the water and engaged _Crimson Typhoon_ and _Cherno Alpha_ , Herc could feel Chuck urging him to get into the fight. It was almost physical, it felt so much like when Max was tugging against his leash. Herc dug down deep, finding the mental reserves to resist doing or saying anything that would make things worse with his son. Stacker needed them to hold back, so he’d hold back.

He could feel Chuck in his brain, urging him to engage the Kaiju. After watching Otachi use its tail to knock first _Crimson_ and then _Cherno_ back on their asses, Herc toggled the switch to open the channel to base. “LOCCENT, _Typhoon_ and _Alpha_ are in trouble. We’re moving in.”

“You are to hold your ground. Do not engage. We need you to carry that bomb. Do you copy?”

Herc paused, not yet willing to disobey a direct order. Both _Crimson_ and _Cherno_ were back on their feet. Then Otachi’s tail whipped up and pinched off _Crimson Typhoon’s_ head. Sasha’s voice came over the comms, calling for backup.

“Jesus, we can’t just sit here and watch ‘em die. Come on!” Chuck snarled. Herc felt another surge of anger and frustration through his link with his son. He tried to fight it, but the truth was, he needed to punch something just as badly as his son did. Punching Chuck wasn’t an option, not if he wanted to keep jockeying. It was much safer to punch a Kaiju, he couldn’t get written up for that.

“Oh screw this.” Herc snarled as he flicked open the communications channel,  “LOCCENT. We’re moving in. NOW.”

“ _Cherno Alpha_ , we’ve been hit with some type of acid.” Sasha Kaidanovsky’s clipped voice rang through the Conn-Pod. Chuck glared at his father, urging his old man to run faster.

“Come on!” Chuck urged his father on as _Striker Eureka_ reacted to their movement in the harness and the giant machine picked up speed, running across the harbor towards the two damaged Jaegers.

“The hull has been compromised. We need backup immediately!” Sasha’s voice sounded unusually sharp.

“Just hold on _Cherno_ , we’re on our way.” Chuck cried. Herc hoped they would arrive in time.

The first punch that _Striker Eureka_ landed released the tension in the neural link between father and son. For a few brief moments, both Hansens were united with a single purpose. Beating the crap out of a giant alien monster.

And for a brief moment, it looked like they were actually winning.

***

“ _Which channel are the Jumphawks monitoring_?” Pit Crew Chief Mei-Ling Feng asked.

Marshall Stacker Pentecost pivoted to look at J-Tech Officer Tendo Choi, who was holding the other walkie-talkie. Choi adjusted the frequency of the walkie-talkie in his hand and held it out to the Marshall. “Channel three sir.”

“All Jumphawks, this is Marshall Stacker Pentecost. Do you copy?”

All sixteen chase helicopters answered in the affirmative. Pentecost’s shoulders sagged in relief. They hadn’t lost the Jumphawks or their crews. He still had eyes and ears in the air. “ _Crimson_ Transport crew, get back to base. We’re launching _Gipsy Danger_. She’s airborne as soon as you get here. _Cherno_ _One_ , check on _Striker Eureka_. _Cherno_ _Two_ and _Three_ , you’re on search and rescue.   _Cherno_ _Four_ through _Eight_ , I want eyes on those Kaiju. Understood?”

“Yes sir!” crackled back over the radio.

As soon as Otachi charged off towards Hong Kong after _Gipsy Danger_ , _Cherno_ _One_ swooped in and plucked _Striker Eureka’s_ pilots off the stranded Jaeger’s shoulder. Due to his broken collarbone, Hercules Hansen had to suffer the indignity of being winched onboard in a basket. His son Chuck Hansen was hauled up in a more dignified manner, standing with one foot hooked through the loop, arm wrapped around the rescue cable, as if posed for the TV cameras that were usually filming them after a battle.   Once the rescue chopper was clear, _Crimson Typhoon’s_ Transport team started the process of connecting cables to _Striker Eureka_ to get her back to base.

When _Cherno One_ landed on the flight deck, it was met by Dr. Lebeau. She stood out of the rain, just inside the open entrance to the Shatterdome next to a transport cart. She waited until the rotors had slowed before opening an enormous umbrella and jogging across the tarmac to the chopper.

The Jumphawk hatch slid open and one of the ground crew ran over with a set of stairs. The flight from their crippled Jaeger back to the Shatterdome had been short, but it was long enough for the initial adrenaline rush to wear off and Herc Hansen was pale and sweating as Chuck helped him down the steps and onto the landing pad.

Dr. Lebeau rushed towards the two Jaeger pilots, white lab coat flapping, holding the umbrella up to shelter both of them from the driving rain. “You alright Herc?” Hansen might be leaning on his son’s arm as he came down the steps, but at least he was standing on his own two feet. Dr. Lebeau moved to support his other side, but stopped when she heard his answer.

“Broken collarbone.”

She whistled, “Well that hurts like a motherfucker doesn’t it?”

“You’re telling me doc.” Herc mustered a wry smile for his friend.

They quickly crossed the platform to the parked cart. “Alright then, let’s get you back to Medical and get that drive suit armor off you ASAP.” She tossed the umbrella in the back and helped Herc into the front passenger bench with Chuck beside him, protecting his injured arm. The doctor climbed into the second row of seats and as the driver took off, she fished a ratchet wrench out of her pocket. Leaning over the seat, she started slowly loosening the bolts that held the back and breastplate of Herc’s armor together.

“Chuck, can you get that right pauldron off by yourself?”

Chuck nodded, his fingers already working at the connections that attached the shoulder to his father’s armor. Herc grunted in pain and Chuck muttered an apology, but kept working at the armor. All of the weight of the upper half of the drive suit hung off either the neck or shoulders of the pilot. Which meant that Herc Hansen currently had about twenty pounds of armor hanging from his broken collarbone. Chuck worked the last connector free and tossed the pauldron past the doctor in the truck bed.

“What now doc?”

“I’ve almost got these all loosened. Support the weight of the breastplate so it’s off his shoulder, will you? We’ll have this off you in a minute, just hold on….” She pressed the release sequence, and the armored casing around the spinal relay retracted with a series of clicks. “Sit forward just a bit, will you Herc?” She carefully peeled the silver neural relay from the armored column along Herc’s spine, careful not to damage the delicate sensors that made the connections along the spine of the circuitry suits. “Got it.” The doctor carefully lay the relay on the seat next to her. It was the most expensive component of the drive suit, she wasn’t going to just toss it in the back with the pauldron. Then she gave the remaining bolts a last few turns and lifted the back plate free. She placed it by her feet, then took the breastplate that Chuck handed her.

She carefully placed a hand on Herc’s good shoulder, “Better?”

Herc gave a long sigh and twisted his head to give her a grateful smile. “Have I told you lately how much I love you doc?”

“If you think you love me now, just wait till I get some painkillers into you.” She grinned affectionately at her old friend, then impulsively kissed his temple. “But I have to remind you, I’m a married woman.”

“And I’m a married man.” Herc had never quite gotten over his wife Maggie’s death eleven years earlier, and they both knew it. Marie squeezed his good shoulder sympathetically. Margaret Hansen had died when the Kaiju Scissure attacked Sydney in 2014. A few weeks later Herc had met Stacker Pentecost at the conference in South Korea when the idea for the Pan Pacific Defense Corps was launched. He was still grieving her loss when Pentecost had invited Hansen to join the Jaeger test pilot program that was being established at the PPDC proving grounds in Kodiak Island, Alaska.

The cart slowed as it rounded the corner, then came to a halt at the entrance to Medical. Dr. Lebeau helped Herc down from the cart and pointed Chuck to take him into one of the treatment rooms, then started giving orders to the half dozen drive suit technicians wait for them. “We’ve already started getting Herc out of his armor. The rest is in the cart.” She pointed towards the back of the cart, and one of the techs headed towards it to retrieve it.

“If you two could help Herc out of the rest of his suit, while I check on Chuck?” She pointed, and the two techs nodded at her. “Be careful, he says he’s got a broken collarbone. I’ll be back with you as soon as I give his son the once over.”

Then she turned and carefully picked up the spinal relay lying on the seat. Cradling it in her arms she handed it to the lead technician. “Here you go Sedna. Sorry, I couldn’t wait for your techs. With a broken collarbone, I needed to start getting Herc out of his suit ASAP.”

“You remembered the release sequence?” Jaeger Specialist Sedna Tulok took the spinal relay from her and carefully nestled it into a customized carrying case, then started attaching diagnostics to the delicate sensor tendrils arranged along the length of the relay.

“I remembered the release sequence. You’ve drilled me on it often enough.” The doctor nodded, and started down the hall after her patients.

“Any idea what hit _Eureka_?” Tulok called after her.

“Current theory from LOCCENT is an EMP. But you’ll have to ask Herc and Chuck.” The doctor said over her shoulder. “ _After_ I’m done with them.” The doctor was quick to add. She knew how single minded the technician could be. “Now let me treat my patients.”

As the doctor tried to lead Chuck towards an examining table. Chuck shook off her arm angrily. “What the hell was that all about?”

“What?”

“You kissing my father!”

Marie laughed. “You know your father and I are old friends. And after you’ve spent months sitting around in your underwear hooked up to monitors and letting me poke around inside your head, you tend to lose any inhibitions that you used to have with each other.”

Chuck was still frowning.

The doctor stopped laughing and turned serious. “Chuck, your father loved your mother. He still does. And I love my husband. So don’t pay our flirting any mind. It’s how we cope with the stress of our jobs.” She tried to shine a light in his eyes to check his pupil dilation, but he looked away, towards his father. “Christ Chuck, quit fussing and let me look at you.”

“You should be taking care of my father, he’s the one that’s hurt!”

“You first. Herc can wait.”

“Are you insane! He’s the one who’s hurt. You need to take care of my father!”

The doctor grabbed Chuck’s arm and made him look at her. “As many times as you’ve Drifted with your father, and you still don’t understand him at all, do you?”

“And you do?” He sneered.

The doctor let go of him. “I’ve known Hercules Hansen for almost ten years now, and there’s two things I can tell you about him.” She waved one finger in his face, “One, your father loves you more than anything.” She poked him in the breastplate. “And you’re an idiot if you don’t know that. And two,” she held up a second finger, “If your father says the only thing wrong with him is a broken collar bone, then you can believe it, because that man…” she waved her hand in the general vicinity of where her assistants had led Hercules Hansen, “Does. NOT. Lie.”

Chuck just stared at her, wide eyed.

The doctor sighed. “Chuck, your father won’t let me treat him until I can tell him that you’re OK. So quit wasting my time and let me examine you so that I can assure him that his son is fine. THEN he’ll let me treat him.” She glared at Chuck. “That’s an order.”

Chuck deflated. “Yes m’am.”

The walkie-talkie lying on the counter squawked. “This is Marshall Pentecost! Medical, do you read me?” he barked.

The doctor snatched it up, “This is Medical. Over.”

“Report! Have we recovered any of the Jaeger teams?”

“I’ve got both pilots from _Striker Eureka_ here now. They’re fine. No word yet on _Cherno Alpha_ or _Crimson Typhoon_.” She looked at Chuck, who wouldn’t meet her eyes. Across the room where the techs were stripping his armor, Herc Hansen shook his head sadly, “Although I don’t think there’s much hope. Over.”

“Understood. Keep me informed if the situation changes.”

“Roger that. Medical out.”

Ten minutes later she’d finished a cursory evaluation of Chuck, and determined that if he was healthy enough to keep fighting with her, he was healthy enough to keep fighting Kaiju. She tossed a towel at him. “You’re soaked. Dry off. And let the techs get you out of that armor.”

When she opened the curtain and stepped into the examining room, she found Herc Hansen sitting on the table in his underwear, a hospital robe draped around his shoulders, cradling his right arm. Senda Tulok was making notes on a tablet.

“Senda, what did I tell you? My patients are more important than your technology. Out! You can interview Herc _after_ I’m done with him.”

“I think I have what I need. Thanks Herc. He’s all yours doc.” Tulok strode out of the room, not the least bit repentant at disobeying the doctor.

The first thing Herc said when she crossed the room was, “How’s my son?”

“Full of piss and vinegar. Worried about you. But he’s fine. Just a few bumps and bruises left over from his fight with Becket the other day. I didn’t mention it to Chuck, but Raleigh must have been pulling his punches. I’ve seen the sort of damage that young man can do in a fight. And he was just playing with Chuck. Smacked him around enough to burn off some aggression and let him know who the alpha dog is, but he didn’t really want to hurt him. If he had, I’d have been treating another broken nose, or broken arm, or dislocated shoulder.”

“I kinda thought as much. No point telling the boy that though.”

“My thoughts exactly. Bad enough he got his ass handed to him. No need to tell him that Becket was pulling his punches too. But enough about Chuck, let’s take a look at you Herc.”

“Collarbone’s broken.”

“You sure?” the doctor carefully removed the robe so she could examine his arm.

“Heard it snap when I hit the wall. Broke it once before, when I was a kid. Playing Aussie rules football. This feels exactly the same.” He grimaced.

“I’m sorry then, this is going to hurt.” The doctor gently probed his injured shoulder. She thought she could feel the break, but stopped when Herc groaned through gritted teeth.

“Sorry Herc. I think you’re right about it being broken. But let’s get some x-rays just to make sure.” She helped him down off the table. “Sally, take Herc down to x-ray and take some shots of that shoulder for me, will you?”

***

Herc’s collarbone was broken. The doctor set the bone, and immobilized Herc’s arm with a sling. Chuck was still hovering in the background when she sat down to talk to Herc about his injuries. “You’re going to be out of commission for several weeks while this heals.”

“How long?” Herc asked.

“At least 12 weeks. But you really shouldn’t jockey for at least 16 – 20 weeks.” Marie knew just what that would mean to the Marshall’s timetable. And the fact that they’d just lost two of the four remaining Jaegers made the news even more dire.

“Jesus Christ!” Chuck exclaimed, before storming off.           

“Will it really take that long Marie?”

“I’ve seen children heal in as quickly as 3 – 6 weeks. But you’re an adult. And 10 – 12 weeks is generally what it takes. And I don’t want you back into a Jaeger until we’re absolutely sure that you’re fully healed. We can’t risk you reinjuring yourself during battle.”

Herc gave a heavy sigh. “Then I guess I’m out of commission.”

“We’ll figure it out somehow. I’ll do some research and see if I can find any therapies to help speed it along.”

“Thanks doc. And I’m sorry Chuck’s such a little shit.” Herc shook his head as they watched his son stalk out of Medical.

The doctor folded her arms and leaned back against the examination table. “It wouldn’t be so bad if he didn’t remind me so much of Jason.”

“I’m sorry Marie.” Herc reached out and squeezed her elbow with his good hand.

“It’s not your fault Herc. I think all the cocky young bucks around here remind me at least a little bit of my son.”

“I just hate to think that after all you’ve done for us, that we could cause you pain.”

“It’s not you causing the pain. It’s the Kaiju. They’re the ones who took my son from me.”

“You know Marie, we’ve never talked about it.”

“About what, Jason? There’s not much to tell. I told you most of it that night I found you and Stacker in the video lab watching the K-Day footage.”

When her eldest child, Jason Lebeau was 18 years old, he’d gone into the family business and enlisted in the military. He’d always wanted to fly, so he chose the Air Force. He’d earned his pilots wings, and been assigned to Vandenburg Air Force Base in California, close to where his parents were stationed at Camp Pendleton.

When the first Kaiju rose out of the ocean and attacked San Francisco, Marie had been glued to the live news feed just like the rest of the country. She’d spotted a familiar tail number on one of the fighters that was firing on the giant beast. But before she’d had time to fully register that it was her son making a strafing run against the Kaiju, the monster swatted the plane out of the sky and the plane exploded into a flaming fireball. Air Force Captain Jason Lebeau had been one of the very first military casualties in the War against the Kaiju, along with Royal Air Force Captain Luna Pentecost and dozens of other soldiers and pilots.

“No, I mean we’ve never talked about what happened between us the last time I was at Anchorage.”

“It’s been five years.”

“I know.”

“You never mentioned it before. Why do you want to talk about it now?”

“I was just wondering…. If you saw anything in my head.”

The doctor looked at him quizzically. “Like what?”

“Anything…. Dangerous?”

**********

Herc had spent hours sifting through Academy student files, without finding anyone who excited him as much as the prospect of Drifting with his son. He’d gone searching for his son, and they’d had an awkward dinner together in the Academy mess hall where Herc tried to keep the conversation going while Chuck only grunted or gave yes or no answers to his questions. Finally Herc gave up and finished his meal in silence.

The next day he’d spent the morning with Stacker, and the afternoon with the Commandant, lobbying for the chance to try a test Drift with his son. They both gave him the same answer. If Marie didn’t approve Chuck to pass Drift Compatibility, there was nothing they could do. Chuck would wash out of the program.

Finally he’d tracked down Marie, to see if she’d made up her mind. He’d caught her in the cafeteria, lingering over a stack of student reviews and a cold cup of coffee. But she hadn’t been as helpful as he’d hoped. In fact, she’d seemed angry at him for bringing it up again.

“You really want me to recommend Chuck as your co-pilot? You want me to approve a _sixteen year old_ to fight Kaiju? The more I think about it, the less I like it. He’s just a boy Herc, he’s not ready for combat yet.”

“My boy needs this.” Herc’s hands fisted unconsciously. “Chuck’s angry and he needs to smash things. I can channel that, help him put all that rage towards doing something good. And I need this too. I don’t know how to be anything but a Ranger anymore. I can’t lose _Striker_.” His voice cracked. “I need to do this for Maggie.” Herc paused to compose himself. “Chuck is still angry with me for not saving his mum. I don’t blame him. I still haven’t been able to forgive myself for not saving Mags,”

“Herc...” Marie knew the whole story of Margaret Hansen’s death, some of which had been highly classified to keep Herc from reading anything that might adversely affect his combat readiness.

He shook her off. “Chuck’s pissed I couldn’t get them both out before they dropped the bomb on Scissure. Maybe if we spend time together in the Drift, he’ll see how much losing Maggie tore me up. And he’s pissed at the Kaiju for killing his mum. Maybe if we can kill Kaiju together, it will help fix some of that too. We both _need_ to kill Kaiju Marie, we both need to slaughter those sons of bitches for what they did to my wife.”

The doctor sat back and looked thoughtful. She’d never considered the cause of Chuck’s behavior problems. He’d just been another pain in the arse student who was convinced he could do no wrong. “Chuck is capable enough, he’s brave, has top simulator scores, he might even be a brilliant tactician. But he’s also temperamental, unpredictable. No one _wants_ to be Drift compatible with him because he’s such an arse Herc.”

“He’s my son. I’ll Drift with him just fine.”

“You know we still haven’t figured out all the factors that make two people Drift Compatible Herc.” She thought a moment, then added, “But one of the current theories floating around the research division is that the secret ingredient to a successful Drift pairing is Love.”

“Love?”

“Yeah, love. It seems that Sergio D’Onofrio had more than a little bit of a crush on Caitlin Lightcap.”

Herc whistled, “Well I’ll be damned. Never saw that coming.”

Marie smiled at him. “Oh, I did. You forget how long Caitlin, Jasper, and I have been working together. I saw what was going on before any of them had even figured it out for themselves.”

“Love huh?”

“It’s the reason why Caitlin can’t do candidate reviews anymore, she’s too much of a romantic. If she’s not careful she falls in love with every candidate she Drifts with, no matter what their gender or orientation.”

Herc frowned and rubbed his chin. “Well, that makes sense with some of the family pairings we’ve got like the Gage twins and me and Scott. And the Jessups and Kaidanovskys are both married couples. But what about Stacker and Tamsin?”

“Both of them loved Luna something fierce. Sometimes it’s not love for each other, but a shared love of something that makes it work. Love of country, love of service, love of battle.” Marie shrugged. “At least that’s the current theory we’re kicking around. But that theory doesn’t go beyond the two of us, understood? The last thing we need is to have students or the press starting up some wild stories about how being Drift Compatible means that there’s some sort of True Romance between pilots.”

“Yeah, that could get awkward for those of us who pilot with family.” He framed his hands in the air, “Herc and Scott Hansen, brave pilots or secretly incestuous lovers?” Herc chuckled. “I definitely don’t need any more scandal attached to my name.” Then he sobered. “But I do need a new co-pilot. And I’d like it to be Chuck.”

The doctor thought for a few minutes. “If I’m going to approve this cockamamie scheme of your Herc, it’s going to cost you.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re going to do me the biggest favor you’ve ever done. I want inside the Conn-Pod of _Lucky Seven_.”

“Sure, I can give you a tour of the old girl before I pass her on to her new pilots.”

“Not that. I want you to take me out in _Lucky Seven_. On a patrol. As your co-pilot.”

“What?” Herc stared at her. She nodded at him. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea Marie.”

“Why not?’

“It’s dangerous.”

“I’m not asking to go into combat Herc. I have zero desire to see action against the Kaiju. Take me out some day when we know there’s not a chance in Hell of a breach. All I’m asking for is a patrol run, nothing more. I just want to feel what a real live Neural Handshake with an actual Jaeger feels like. Not just a simulation.”

“Why?”

“We’ve been starting to see PTSD in some of the Jaeger pilots. You know that’s one of the reasons why I was brought on board with the Jaeger program; I’ve been studying the effects of combat on veterans for 20 years now. I need to understand what causes some of the combat trauma I see, and the best way to do that, without actual combat, is to drift with a combat veteran. But none of the veterans are willing to risk their team dynamics by drifting with an outsider. But you’re perfect. Scott’s grounded. So it won’t affect your Neural Handshake with him if you Drift with me. Your new partner hasn’t been chosen yet, so Drifting with me won’t affect that either.

I’m supposed to be one of the foremost experts on Human/Machine interaction. Except that I haven’t done this one thing. I haven’t jockeyed a Jaeger. I need to understand what it means to Drift, what it feels like to drive a Jaeger. And I’ve been trying to figure out what it is about the Neural Interface that is making Ranger PTSD different from other cases that I’ve seen. I desperately need to experience the Drift in order to be able to treat the trauma that I’ve been seeing in some pilots when we lose a Jaeger.”

“Stacker?”

“Stacker’s just one case. We’ve had other injured pilots, and a couple have had to retire. Some of them are in better shape than others. We’ve been upgrading the Jaegers every year, better shielding, better armaments, making them faster and stronger. But we still don’t understand enough about how the Neural Handshake actually works. Or how to make them safer for the pilots. You and I both know that in battle a Jaeger is only as good as her pilots. It’s my job to figure out how to upgrade the _pilots_. And I can’t do that if I don’t even understand what it feels like to walk out the Shatterdome door inside a Jaeger.”

“But what makes you think we could Drift together?”

“I’ve been Drifting in the Training Simulator with pilot candidates for months now.”

Herc’s jaw dropped, then he caught himself and closed his mouth with an almost audible snap.

“You didn’t know? I replaced Caitlin on the candidate review board a couple of years ago. I took her slot as the instructor who gives the final yea or nay on a candidate’s Drift Sync training before we bump ‘em up to Paired Drift Simulations. At this point I think I’ve got a couple hundred drops under my belt in the simulator with students. I’m the most experienced “pilot” on the medical and research staff. But it’s not the same thing as actually having piloted a Jaeger.

I _still_ have Rangers telling me that the Training Simulator is nothing at all like actually jockeying a Jaeger. That something about the actual Neural Handshake with a fully functioning Jaeger changes your mind. None of them can’t describe it except to say that it opens it your mind up some way.”

“Yeah, yea it does something to you. I couldn’t exactly tell you what though.” Herc scrubbed his hand through his hair.

Marie laughed. “That’s what all the Rangers say. And they tell me that they can always tell when there’s another Ranger in the room. Like they can hear their minds or something.”

“It’s not ESP or anything Marie. But yeah, somehow you can always sense when there’s another pilot around. I couldn’t tell you why though.”

“Nobody can. My theory is that the Neural Handshake either lays down new neural pathways in the brain, or opens up existing pathways that have never been used before.   At any rate, I’ve done about all the interviews, tests, and brain scans that I can do. And I still don’t understand it. So I’ve been looking for the opportunity to go out in a Jaeger with someone so I can experience it for myself.

So that’s my deal with you. If you want my recommendation to allow Chuck to Drift with you, you’re going to have to Drift with me first.”

“Why would you want to Drift with me doc?”

“Because I trust you Herc. And while we don’t quite understand Drift Compatibility, we do know that Trust is crucial to making the connection. We’ve known each other for years, I think we’d Drift fine together. Stacker and I have had a couple of long conversations about it. Stacks tells me that a good Drift is silence. I’ve been practicing meditation since I was in college. Hell, I’ve been doing yoga since I was a child.”

“It’s more than just controlling your thoughts Marie.”

She reached out and touched his hand, lying on the table between them.

“And I promise you I’m not going to fall in love with you Herc. I love Pierre. I always have, since the first moment I met him. He’s the love of my life, and nothing I see inside anyone else’s head is ever going to change that. Besides, I already love you Herc.”

He looked at her, surprised.

“I love you and Stacker and all the other test pilots. I love you like brothers. You’re all family to me.” She squeezed his hand. “Trust me. Take me out in _Lucky Seven_. When we come back, I’ll write the recommendation for you to have your son as your co-pilot. But remember, relationships matter. I can’t promise you that you two will be Drift Compatible. Only that I’ll write you the recommendation. The rest is up to you two.”

***

Herc and Marie had flown to Hong Kong and taken _Lucky Seven_ out for a three hour patrol around the harbor. And when they got back to Anchorage, the doctor had kept her promise. But before Herc had been allowed to attempt a Drift with his son, Chuck had first had to pass his psyche evaluation for Drift compatibility. Dr. Lebeau personally ran the battery of standardized tests that the scientists in J-Tech division had developed over the past couple of years to test whether or not a candidate was physically and mentally compatible with the Neural Interface technology used to initiate the paired piloting that they’d come to call the Drift.

“When you connect to the Neural Handshake simulator, you’re going to feel a lot of memories stirred up. Don’t focus on them. Just let them flow by, just the way we practiced in meditation class. Ignore the chatter of your Monkey Brain. Stay in the Drift. The Drift is Silence.”

She’d been surprised, but Chuck had passed every one of her tests with flying colors.

***

In all his years as a Test Pilot for the Jaeger program, Herc had never been nervous before a drop. But before his first drop with Chuck he’d been nervous as hell. Well, maybe not nervous, but he definitely felt a shiver of anticipation that wasn’t something he usually felt. Killing Kaiju was easy. Trying to really connect with his son? That was going to be anything but easy.

Marie had told him the current theory that the secret ingredient to Drift Compatibility was Love.   He’d woken up that morning with the idea still niggling around in the back of his mind. Did his son love him? Would they be able to connect in the Drift if he didn’t? What would it mean if he could connect with Marie, but not with Chuck? He’d been up half the night worrying about it.

*****

Dr. Lebeau stood in the Academy LOCCENT with the Commandant and the Academy J-Tech command crew and observed their first test Drift. They were using _Brawler Yukon_ as their training Jaeger, even though the technology had made huge advances since the old Mark-1 had first been deployed.

Lebeau could tell the moment that sync happened between father and son. She saw the tension ease out of Herc’s face on the monitor, and watched confusion and then delight flash across Chuck’s face. The two pilots stretched out their arms in front of them, then pulled back and put up their dukes, fists up in a defensive boxer’s pose. They moved in tandem, and _Brawler Yukon_ mimicked the moves of her two pilots.

There was no chatter on the comms, but the doctor knew that Herc was in command, giving instructions to his son in Drift space. She could almost hear what he was saying, it was so obvious when Chuck mimed his movements.

“Make a fist with your right hand. Now pull back and throw a punch. Now make a fist with your left hand. Pull back and punch.”

Herc ran them through a series of combinations, all of the standard battle tactics that he’s developed with Scott in the three years they’d been jockeying _Lucky Seven_ together. And by the time they were finished, every move, every single one was in perfect sync.

When they exited the Conn-Pod, Marie was waiting for them on the gantry.

“So doc, did we pass?” Herc asked. He couldn’t keep the cocky grin off his face. He knew they’d done well.

“You passed.” She was so happy that she hugged him. “Your compatibility scores are off the charts. Congratulations.” She turned to Chuck and shook his hand. Herc’s son was beaming too. The doctor realized that he was actually a good looking kid when he wasn’t frowning or brooding about something.

When they reached LOCCENT the J-Tech Chief spoke, “Herc, for a first Drift that was remarkable. I’ve never seen pilots sync up so quickly. I’ve rarely seen two pilots move together like that, not even after years in harness together.”

Herc was watching the tape of their test on one of the LOCCENT consoles.   He whistled when he saw how _Brawler_ was moving. “How was that even possible?”

Chuck piped up from where he was standing behind his father. “I’ve studied all of your mission tapes. I know all your moves by heart da.” He moved up next to his father, “This one here?” he pointed,   “You used that one against Reckoner in Hong Kong.”

Herc grabbed his son and gave him a fierce hug. “That’s my boy!” he cried proudly, thumping his back and smiling over his head at Marie, “That’s my boy!”

***

Chuck had graduated the Academy in June 2019. Herc had made it a point to be there this time.

They’d spent the next six months field testing _Striker Eureka_ while they both learned her systems. Herc had reveled in the feeling of being back in the harness. _Striker_ was everything he’d remembered from that first test run, strong, fast, agile. Of all the Jaegers he’d test piloted over the years, _Striker_ was by far the best.

They’d celebrated his son’s 16th birthday together in Sydney in August. Herc had bought Chuck a used car. Chuck had immediately taken his savings from three months of Ranger pay, traded in the car, and bought himself a sports car. Herc had shook his head, but let him keep the car. But inside, he was wondering if Chuck was just a bit too much like his uncle Scott.

Then, in November, they’d finally had the official launch of _Striker Eureka_. Both Stacker Pentecost and Marie Lebeau had attended the launch and the celebration afterwards. At the after party, Marie had congratulated him, hugged him, then whispered in his ear, “I hope you don’t live to regret this Herc.”

“I won’t.” He’d grinned at her.   He had a Jaeger again. And he had his son back. What was there to regret?

**********

Dr. Lebeau took his good hand in hers and gave it a squeeze. “When I was in your head five years ago I saw a brave soldier, a faithful husband, and a loving father doing the best he could to raise his son. Nothing more. Nothing less.” She stood between his knees, cradled his face in her hands, forcing him to look at her. “You are a good man Hercules Hansen, a good man.”

She pulled his head down and kissed his forehead. “Go find Chuck. Make peace with your son.”

Herc hopped down off the table. She called after him, “And come back and see me as soon as those painkillers wear off. I’ll have something from the pharmacy for you by then.”

***

When Herc Hansen left Medical, he went looking for his son. He found him in the Mess Hall, feeding his bulldog Max scraps from his lunch.

“I heard you giving the doc some grief. What was that all about Chuck?”

“I don’t like how you two are so friendly. It’s disrespectful to mum.”

“Marie’s a good woman. I’ve known her since back when Stacker and I were test pilots for the Mark-1s. We three spent a lot of time together back in the day. Other than you, there’s nobody that’s spent more time inside my head than the doc. If it weren’t for her and Stacks I don’t know how I would have survived the loss of your mum.”

“Really?” Chuck sneered. “What does she know about losing a family member?”

“Boy, shut your mouth. You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Chuck started to say something more, but Herc cut him off. “You know that famous footage of Trespasser? Where he swats an F-22 out of the sky?” Herc stabbed a finger at Chuck, “That fireball? That was Marie’s son, Air Force Captain Jason Lebeau. So don’t you _dare_ say she doesn’t understand loss. That woman not only watched her only son die on live TV, but she’s had to relive his death every time they show that footage. And you know they show it _all the damn time_.

The fact that she can bear to spend any time at all around pilots after that says more than I ever could about her level of professionalism. I respect the hell out of that woman. And if you know what’s good for you, you’ll show her the respect that she deserves. If only because she outranks you. And she can ground your ass if she chooses. Hell, if it weren’t for her, you wouldn’t even be jockeying a Jaeger.” It was out of his mouth before Herc realized what he was saying.

“What the hell do you mean old man?”

Herc might have been able to hold his tongue, but if there was one thing that pissed him off, it was when Chuck reminded him of his age. And so he went ahead and said it, “You were going to wash out of the Ranger program.” He stabbed a finger in Chuck’s chest. “Marie’s the one who convinced the Commandant to let me try Drifting with you when I needed a co-pilot for _Striker_. You’re a Ranger because of her. And because you’re Drift compatible with me. Nobody else was willing to put up with your sorry arse.”

“Well why the hell did you do that?”

“Because damn it Chuck, I need to kill Kaiju. For your mother.” Herc snarled, and then waved his good hand at his sling. “And now I can’t.”

Herc turned to stalk off, but there was a commotion at the door and Raleigh Becket and Mako Mori strode into the Mess Hall surrounded by crowds of people trying to slap them on the back and congratulate them. Herc fought his way through the crowds of people towards the new team. He knew how hard it was to connect with a new partner after losing your first one, and what an achievement their first kill had been for both of them. “Raleigh!”

He wanted to acknowledge Mako too. He reached out and shook her hand and she rewarded him with a shy smile. Just like Stacker’s kid to be modest after her first kill. But knew he wasn’t the one she wanted approval from.

He glanced back over his shoulder at where Chuck was standing behind him, then turned to Becket. “My kid’d never admit it, but he’s grateful.” He held out his hand. “We both are.”

***

After the Marshall left the Mess Hall, Chuck didn’t feel like standing around watching people slap Becket and Mori on the back. He took Max outside for a walk while he tried to shake off his foul temper, then headed back towards his quarters. But he couldn’t stop thinking about what his father had said about him washing out of the Jaeger program.

He sat in the chair at his desk for a long, long time, idly scratching Max’s head. Finally he shook himself, and opened the computer terminal.

Chuck entered his father’s PPDC ID number. Then he looked at the password field and thought for a few seconds. Then he typed in his mother’s first name and her birth date.

“Access denied.”

Chuck entered his mother’s name and the date of her death.

“Access denied.”

He cursed, then tried his mother’s name and his parent’s wedding anniversary.

“Access granted.”

“Figures. The old man is so predictable.” Chuck entered his own PPDC ID number, and pulled up his records. The first thing that came up was his personnel dossier. He skimmed over it, only glancing at the familiar names and dates and the long list of the Kaiju he’d killed while piloting with his father. Down at the bottom of the file his eye caught on a note about their readiness.

NOTES

`One of the youngest Rangers in the Defense Corps, Charles is headstrong and impulsive. Charles Hansen is loyal to his father Hercules but also constantly seeks to supplant him and assume a dominant role in Striker Eureka's operation. This may affect the father-son Drift, if it has not already.`

`The Hansens should be monitored very closely and reassigned if necessary for Jaeger readiness.`

Nothing he didn’t already know. The old man was getting on in years, it was only a matter of time before he retired and Chuck had to find a new co-pilot. He closed the personnel dossier, then flipped past the application that had gotten him into the Academy. He was looking for the document that got him into a Conn-Pod.

There it was. His Jaeger Academy student assessment. He skimmed over the summary on the first page. He’d passed all the initial assessments with flying colors. Once they’d started training, he’d applied himself and channeled all his anger at his father into kicking some ass in the training room. Then he found the section he was looking for.

`Drift Sync Testing`

  *        `  Candidate has excellent scores during solo simulator training. 45 drops, 42 kills.`
  *         ` However, candidate was not judged a fit candidate to graduate to paired Drift Sync Testing due to his disagreeable personality and lack of a partner willing to attempt Drift with him.`



**Note:** `At the recommendation of Dr. Marie Lebeau, Charles Hansen will be admitted to Drift Sync Training with his father, Hercules Hansen, as a possible co-pilot candidate. It is hoped that pairing this candidate with a veteran Ranger will help provide a stabilizing influence and allow the candidate to complete Ranger training.`

So it was true. The only reason he was a Ranger was because his father had pulled strings for him. Not just the first time to get him into the Academy, but a second time when he was going to wash out of the program.   Chuck hung his head and Max nudged his hand, then licked his fingers. Chuck idly scratched his ears while he considered what that meant. All his life he’d tried to get out from under his old man’s shadow. To make something of himself that his da could be proud of. But instead he’d ended up paired with his da, his career still tied to being Hercules Hansen’s son. And now it turns out that the only reason he was a Ranger at all was because of the old man? Christ.

Chuck was just about to close his file when something else spotted his eye. He scrolled to the scanned image of someone’s handwritten notes.

_In my professional opinion, Hercules Hansen is a stronger fighter when he Drifts with his son Chuck than he ever was when he Drifted with his brother Scott. While the younger Hansen may be volatile and angry, his father is able to channel that rage into their battle simulations. I predict that over time, these two could become one of our most successful fighting pairs. I strongly recommend allowing Hercules Hansen and Charles Hansen to pilot Striker Eureka together._

_Signed_

_Dr. Marie Lebeau, CMO_

***

For the second time in two days, Herc found himself having a furious argument with his son.

Stacker had just promoted him to Marshall and transferred responsibility for the Shatterdome onto his shoulders before surprising him with the news that he was kicking off Operation Pitfall immediately and taking Herc’s place piloting _Striker Eureka_.

So now was _not_ a good time for Chuck to start questioning his father’s orders.

“What the hell is going on here?”

“Collarbone’s broken, I can’t jockey. You’ll go out with Stacker as your co-pilot.”

“The old man? He hasn’t been in harness for what, seven, eight years? Does he even remember how to turn the damn thing on? Let alone fight?”

“I can count the number of pilots with a solo kill on their record on one hand, and he’s one of ‘em. Stacker’s one of the finest pilots I’ve ever worked with. And he’s a damn good Ranger. There’s nothing about _Striker Eureka_ that he can’t handle. Not with you there to show him the ropes.”

“And what if I say no?” Chuck crossed his arms on front of him.

“Goddamit Chuck, you’re a Ranger. Fucking act like one. I raised you better than this. Your superior officer gives you an order, you follow it. Do you hear me? You follow orders.” Herc glared at his son. Chuck glared back for a moment, then lowered his eyes.

“Everyone!” The Marshall’s booming voice brought everyone to attention. “Listen up!”

Slowly Pentecost climbed up onto a stabilizer, so that people could see him. He stood for a moment, head down, back to the crowed. Herc thought his old friend looked tired. They were all tired. It had been a long, hard war and it wasn’t over yet. Not yet.

Stacker waited until the crowd had drawn close, and he gave a quick check over his shoulder to make sure he had everyone’s attention. Then he started speaking. “ _Today, today… at the edge of our hope_ ,”

He turned to face the crowd, the people he had sworn to lead and protect. “ _At the end of our time_. _We have chosen not only to believe in ourselves, but in each other_.”

He waved his hand at the workers gathered in front of him. “ _Today there’s not a man nor woman in here that shall stand alone. Not today_.” He shook his head.

“ _Today_ ,” he raised his voice so that everyone could hear him, “ _we face the monsters that are at our door and bring the fight to them!_

 _Today, we are cancelling the apocalypse!_ ”

The crowd bust into cheers, everyone clapping. Herc wished he could clap too. Stacks wasn’t much for making speeches, but when he did, they tended to be good ones.

As Stacker climbed down off the stabilizer and people started patting the Rangers on the back, wishing them luck, Herc grabbed Max’s leash out of Chuck’s hand. “Go suit up.” He tilted his head towards Pentecost, “Don’t keep the Marshall waiting.” Herc turned and walked away before he could say anything he’d regret later.

***

Chuck was stalking through the hallways in his battle armor when a voice called out to him.

“Ranger Hansen, a word?”

He turned to see Doctor Lebeau coming towards him.

“What do you want?”

“I wanted to talk to you about your father.”

“His collarbone’s broken, I know. I’m stuck with the Marshall as a co-pilot on this mission.”

“That’s what I wanted to talk to you about. Drifting with someone besides your father.”

“What do you care? Not that it was any of your damn business. I’ve read my personnel file, I saw what you wrote in my Academy evals. You didn’t even want me and my father to Drift together in the first place. Da had to twist your arm to get the Corps to let us even attempt a Neural Handshake.”

“As Chief Medical Officer it was absolutely my business to evaluate your fitness for duty and your potential as a Ranger. And while it’s true that I had my doubts about letting you two pilot together, you proved me wrong. The truth is, Herc is a better pilot with you than he ever was with Scott. You make him a better man…” She paused, “But I think he wishes he’d made you a better man.”

“Fuck you.” Chuck turned to walk away.

“Ranger!” He stopped short at her tone. He knew when someone was about to tear him a new one. It had happened to him often enough during his career in the PPDC.

The doctor walked around to stand in front of him and he could almost hear her counting to ten inside her head before she spoke. When she did, he was surprised at her soft tone of voice. “Chuck, I don’t want to argue with you. Your father doesn’t want to argue with you. Why do you make it so hard to just have a damn conversation?” she held up her hand, “Don’t answer that. Don’t speak. Just listen.” She glared at him. He nodded.

“You taking _Striker Eureka_ out without him is really hard on your father. He’s worried something is going to happen to you. And he won’t be there to stop it.”

“Like the old man cares what happens to me.” Chuck snarled. The doctor glared at him again and he shut up.

“You young idiot. Your father loves you more than his own life. I didn’t need to Drift with him to know that. And it’s killing him that he won’t be there by your side on this mission to keep an eye on you and keep you safe.

It’s always been that way. Why do you think he hasn’t retired yet? Forty-four is _old_ for a Ranger to still be jockeying. He long since should have taken a command position. But he doesn’t trust anyone else with his only son. So he keeps pushing himself to stay in the field.” She stabbed at his chest with one finger, “With you. If you were going into battle with anyone less than The Marshall by your side your father absolutely wouldn’t allow it. And he’s got the rank and seniority to forbid it.”

“He loves you.” She gripped his arm, “He _loves_ you. Don’t leave without making up with your father. If anything goes wrong, he’ll never forgive himself for not being there beside you.”

Chuck just stared at her.

“Dismissed. Now go find your father before you leave.”

***

Herc caught up with Stacker and Chuck in the hallway, they were headed towards the express elevator up to _Striker Eureka’s_ Conn-Pod. Herc saw his son’s back stiffen. He wondered what Stacks had said to him. Max barked when he spotted his master, and Chuck turned around. Herc saw Stacks drop his head, he recognized his friend’s trick of speaking low, pulling you in close, when he was saying something that he didn’t want his ever-present Constable shadows to overhear. Herc stopped, he knew whatever Stacker was saying was for Chuck’s ears only. Whatever it was he said, Chuck stuck out his hand and they shook. Then Stacker shot him a look he couldn’t interpret, and Chuck turned to face his father.

Herc waited, while Chuck slowly walked towards him. He wanted to make peace with his son. But it seemed like every time he tried to talk to the boy the past couple of days, they’d ended up having a furious row. He struggled to find the right words, “You know… When you Drift with someone. You feel like there’s nothing to talk about.” Herc paused, struggling to figure out just what he wanted to say. “I just hope I don’t regret all the things I never said out there.”

“Don’t.” Chuck cut him off, shaking his head. “You don’t need to….” Chuck dropped his head. Herc looked down the hallway where Stacker was waiting in the elevator. Pentecost nodded at him, giving them permission to take as long as they needed. Chuck raised his head and looked right in his father’s eyes. “I know them all. I always have.”

Max barked. Chuck bent over and grabbed Max’s collar. “Hey, hey handsome. Oh, I’m going to miss you.” He knelt and kissed his head. Then he stood and faced his father again. “You look after him for me.” Herc nodded curtly as Chuck turned and walked towards the elevator.

“Stacker.” Herc called after him, “That’s my son you got there.” Chuck stopped and turned to face him. “My son!” His voice cracked as he said the words.

***

Like everyone else in the Shatterdome, Dr. Marie Lebeau knew when Operation Pitfall was launched. In her case, it was because Medical had experienced a wave of patients suffering from anxiety and panic attacks now that there was nothing to do but wait. During the several hours it took for the Transport teams to deliver _Striker Eureka_ and _Gipsy Danger_ to the Breach, Medical also admitted at least two patients for cardiac arrest, and one woman who went into premature labor. The tension was getting to everyone, and Dr. Lebeau was kept busy treating patients who were buckling under the stress.

But when two scientists had raced from the landing pad, through the Shatterdome, to LOCCENT bleeding from their eyeballs, one of the Jumphawk flight crew had had the presence of mind to call Medical and ask the doctor to meet them at LOCCENT. Doctor Lebeau had left her staff to deal with the chaos in Medical and headed up to the LOCCENT at a run.

She arrived in LOCCENT just in time to hear Dr. Geiszler say, “It’s a triple event.”

“God, I was right…” Dr. Gottlieb whispered.

Over the LOCCENT comm systems, she heard Pentecost ask, “How big is it? What Category?”

“ _Striker_ it’s a category five. The first ever.”

Dr. Gottlieb was looking shaky on his feet. He allowed Dr. Lebeau to lead him to a chair and he lowered himself into it gratefully. The doctor took his pulse, which was racing. She shone a penlight in his eyes to examine the hemorrhage blooming across one eyeball. He was clearly suffering from shock, but he refused to leave the LOCCENT to go to Medical. She forced a mild sedative into him, hoping it was the right choice, but too worried by his racing heartbeat to risk leaving him un-medicated. She waved over one of the officers who had crowded into the back of the room and ordered him to give her his jacket, which she wrapped around Gottlieb to help with his shivering.

Then she turned her attention to Dr. Geiszler, who turned out to be another story entirely. He shook off her arm when she tried to lead him to a quiet corner so she could get a good look at him. She’d heard a wild rumor that he’d actually tried to Drift with a Kaiju. And she was concerned to see that he had the same ocular hemorrhage as Dr. Gottlieb, as well as a bleeding cut on his forehead and a wad of tissue stuffed up one nostril. But he refused to allow her to treat him, he was too busy watching the monitors, bouncing from one to another to check the various reading being transmitted from the Kaiju monitoring stations on the ocean floor and the two Jaegers slowly approaching the Breach. Dr. Lebeau found a spot in the back of the room where she could keep an eye on the two scientists and was soon as enthralled by the battle as everyone else in the LOCCENT.

***

“Brace for impact!”

“The release is jammed. We can’t deliver the payload sir. We’re still armed. But the hull is compromised. Half our systems are off line sir.”

“We need to override the…” the transmission cut off before Pentecost could finish what he was saying.

Marie turned to the biometrics station and hovered over the shoulder of the tech monitoring the pilots of _Striker Eureka_. Both hemispheres showed strong life signs. She breathed a sigh of relief. They’d only lost communications, the Jaeger and both her pilots were still alive.

There was a long period of silence, where everyone in the room watched the colored lights that indicated the two Jaegers and the three Kaiju, locked in deadly combat. She almost jumped when Tendo finally spoke, “Both Kaiju are converging on _Striker_. Fast.”

The next few minutes were a jumble of status updates and conflicting orders. Both Jaegers were badly damaged, it seemed like neither would be able to complete the mission. _Striker_ couldn’t release her nuclear payload, and _Gipsy_ was missing an arm and barely able to limp along with one knee crippled. Finally Pentecost gave one final order.

“No Raleigh, listen to me, you know exactly what you need to do. _Gipsy_ is nuclear. Take her into the Breach.”

Raleigh acknowledged him. “I hear you sir. Heading for the Breach. Now.”

“What can we do sir?” Chuck asked.

“We can clear a path.” Pentecost replied. “For the Lady.”

Tendo’s voice was soft, but the room was completely silent, so everyone heard when he said, “They’re going to detonate the payload.”

Doctor Lebeau’s heart fell. So Pitfall had been a suicide mission after all. She pushed her way through the crowd until she was standing behind Herc Hansen.

Chuck’s voice crackled through the speakers. “Well, my father always said, he said, if you have the shot, you take it. So let’s do this. It was a pleasure sir.”

Marie wanted to do something, maybe hold his hand, something to let him know he was not alone during this awful moment. But Herc’s right arm was in the sling, and his left hand had a death grip on the LOCCENT microphone.   So instead she placed one hand flat on his back as he hunched over the microphone. Listening to his son, his only son’s last minutes on Earth. Marie felt her heart break just a little bit as she relived once again that horrible moment when Jason had made his final run against Trespasser on K-Day and she had stood in front of the huge TV monitor and watched her son die. She could feel the tension in his shoulders, so she gripped his good shoulder, willing her strength into him through her hand on his back.

There was dead silence in LOCCENT as all eyes watched the monitors. There was a quick burst of Japanese over the comms, just before all the readouts for _Striker Eureka_ went dark.

Herc bowed his head and closed his eyes. Marie felt tears streak down her face. She brushed at them with her sleeve.

Raleigh’s voice crackled through the speakers. “Systems are critical. Fuel’s leaking. Our right leg’s crippled. Let’s finish this.”

“What are they doing?” Newt asked, bewildered.

“Finishing the mission.” Herc straightened up and looking over his shoulder, he nodded to Marie. He’d be alright. For now. At least until the mission was over. She nodded back. She’d be there for him, whenever he needed her.

“LOCCENT, we have the Kaiju carcass. We’re heading for the Breach. You guys better be right, ‘cause one way or another, we’re getting this thing done.”

***

After the hysterical jubilation that greeted the news that Operation Pitfall had been a success, Dr. Lebeau had retreated back to Medical, where things weren’t any less chaotic. Her staff were still dealing with the influx of anxious, panicked patients that had been there when she’d gone up to LOCCENT to treat Doctors Geiszler and Gottlieb.

The doctor had no idea how long she’d been working when she heard someone call her name. “Marie?” She looked up to see Hercules Hansen standing at the entrance to Medical.

She tapped a nurse to take over for her and handed over the patient chart she’d been reviewing, “Herc? You all right?”

Herc tilted his head towards the sling. “It hurts.” He didn’t have to tell her that he meant more than the collarbone. She could see it in his eyes, red rimmed with pain and grief.

“Let’s see if we can get you something for that. Come to my office.” _Where we can have some privacy._ She thought. _It’s the least that I can do for our new Marshall._

Herc followed her silently to her office. She let him in, hung out her Do Not Disturb sign and carefully locked the door behind her. She crossed to her desk and pulled the Scotch and two tumblers out of the bottom drawer. She set them on the edge of the desk and poured two healthy doses. Then she leaned back against the desk and looked at Hansen. He stood in the middle of her office, his eyes closed, head bowed. “Talk to me Herc.” She coaxed him.

“My boy.” His voice cracked. He took a breath and looked up at her. The doctor almost gasped at the raw pain in his eyes. “Oh God Marie, you were right. When you said I might live to regret choosing Chuck as my co-pilot?   You were right….”

“I didn’t want to be. I hoped I’d be wrong.” She said softly. She was regretting those words all those years ago.

“He was too young.” Herc’s voice cracked again and he gave up on talking.

She sighed. “They’re always too young Herc. Always.” She watched his face crumple, and swiftly moved towards him. Carefully wrapping one arm around his waist, cautious of his wounded collarbone, she held him tightly in her arms. Sometimes it was all that you could do, hold the grieving, when you knew that there was nothing to say that could take their pain away. Herc’s one good arm clutched at her so tightly that it hurt. She ignored the pain. “I know.” She said soothingly, “I know.” Herc dropped his head against her shoulder, and she moved her hand up to cradle his head.

He buried his forehead in her shoulder and she stroked his head and neck, the same way she used to comfort her son when he was a little boy. “I _do_ know. I remember what it was like to lose Jason. To have to watch him die.” She whispered. “And it didn’t make it any better knowing that it was his job. That he’d given his life to save others. I know….” Her voice cracked as her own aching grief, never too far from the surface these days, welled up once again.

“And Stacker…. I lost my boy _and_ my best mate today.” Herc’s rough voice whispered in her ear.

“I know. I loved him too.” How were they going to get along without Pentecost’s steadying influence? He’d always been the solid core of the PPDC, the hub around which everything else seemed to rotate: the PONS project, the Mark-1 test program, Jaeger Academy, the Ranger program, the Shatterdomes. He’d been at the center of it _all_ for as long as she could remember. “They saved us Herc.” It was just finally sinking in for her that it was really over, the Breach was sealed. They’d won. They wouldn’t need the PPDC anymore. They’d paid a terrible price, but they’d won the Kaiju war.

Herc cried against her shoulder, great heaving shuddering sobs that broke her heart. She loosed the reins on her own grief and cried with him, partly from relief, partly for the loss of her own son so many years before. She held him tight, willing her own strength into his body by force of will. Herc would survive the loss of his son, the same way she has survived the loss of Jason. “It’s OK, I know it doesn’t feel like it now, but it will be OK. I’m here for you. I’m here.” She could feel the tension start to ease, start to feel his spine start to relax under the hand she was still stroking down his neck and back.

When Herc finally stepped away from her, Marie turned and fumbled for the box of tissues on her desk. She noisily blew her nose, then held the box out towards Hansen. He grabbed a handful, awkwardly blowing his nose with one hand. She pointed towards the couch and when he sat, she handed him the Scotch she’d poured.

He sat staring at it for a long time before he suddenly tossed it back, emptying the glass. The doctor took the glass from him, then sat next to him on the couch. She held his good hand in hers. Herc leaned in towards her, and she let him rest against her shoulder.   Searching for somewhere to put her arm that wouldn’t cause pain from his collarbone, she finally settled on petting his head and neck again. They sat quietly for a long time, each lost in their own thoughts.

Finally Herc broke the silence. His voice was rough. “How do you go on after losing a child? How do I go on without my son? How did you go on after losing Jason?” He tilted his head to look up at her.

Marie turned her head and kissed his forehead. She leaned her cheek against the top of his head as she thought about her answer. Finally she spoke. “It’s overwhelming at first. It’s all you can think about. But you get up every day and you go through the motions.

You do the work. You lean on your friends and family. You cry when you need to. But you get through it somehow. Later, you won’t remember how you survived it, but somehow you do. Grief can’t kill you unless you let it. And we’re too ornery to just curl up and die.” She squeezed his hand. He squeezed back.

“Don’t try to fight your grief, it has to come out eventually. You mourn as long as you need to. Pierre and I cried for weeks. I think I cried myself to sleep for at least two months. Pierre was worried I’d never stop. But eventually, some day, you wake up, and the fact that you’ve lost your child isn’t the first thought in your head. And then one day you realize you went the whole day without thinking about your loss. And when the grief finally starts to ease, _then_ you can safely stuff it down and try to go on with your life.

But sometimes, when you least expect it, it sneaks up on you. You see something, or hear a song, or find an old photo, and it all comes rushing back. And you ache all over again. And you cry more tears. But you remind yourself that if you hadn’t loved them so fiercely, it wouldn’t hurt so much. And you accept the pain, because it means you loved them. So you remember birthdays and anniversaries and happy memories. You honor them by remembering them. You tell stories about them. You brag about them. You hold them in your heart.

“How do you live with the regret? The things you never said?”

“Oh Herc, I was hoping you two had mended fences. I asked Chuck to talk to you before he left…”

“He did. Or at least he tried to.”

“What happened?”

“Even though I knew it could be good-bye, I couldn’t say it. I couldn’t tell my boy how much I loved him.” Herc’s voice cracked again and Marie knew this was the thing that was causing the worst of his pain. And she knew that this one thing, _this_ was one worry she could ease for him.

“You two Drifted together long enough, he knew how much you loved him. He _knew_.” She hugged him fiercely. “Hell, it was the first thing I saw in your mind when we Drifted together, how much you loved your son and how desperate you were that I approve him as your Drift partner. I Drifted with you for three hours and I knew how much you loved Chuck. He Drifted with you for three _years_. He knew. There’s no way he could have spent any amount of time in your head without knowing that in his bones Herc. Your son knew how much you loved him. ”

Hercules Hansen broke down again, sobbing on the doctor’s shoulder. And Marie Lebeau cried with him, for the beloved sons that they had lost and would never see again.

**Author's Note:**

> This story was supposed to be about Dr. Lebeau, but ended up being more about Herc and Chuck. I have pages and pages written about the doctor. She’s been in my head longer than the other characters I’ve created. I’m still not quite sure how her husband Pierre ended up getting mentioned in two stories before I managed to finish and publish one about her. At any rate, she’s a central character in my re-imagined Pacific Rim Universe (the one where there are more than two female characters). So you’ll be seeing more of the good doctor in future stories.
> 
> I try to write stories that are as close to canon as I can get. But sometimes it’s just not possible and you have to change things to make a story work. In this case I had to monkey around with the timeline a bit to make things work. According to the novelization, Striker Eureka was in Manila battling MN-19 with Gipsy Danger and Horizon Brave. But then Travis Beacham changed his mind and said it was Lucky Seven in Manila. I chose to make Manila Herc’s last mission in Lucky Seven with his brother Scott, since there were two other Jaegers around to pick up the pieces while Herc was distracted by what he’d seen in his brother’s head during their Drift and fighting with his brother about it.
> 
> I also just had to change the name of Herc’s wife and Chuck’s mother. It’s bad enough that she’s another female character who only exists solely to die and give two male characters man-pain. But they had to call her Angela (angel) too. I just couldn’t… If I was going to write about this character she needed a little bit more personality than “dead female character.” So in my version of the Pacific Rim world her name is Margaret. And her husband called her Maggie. And she may show up in future stories too.
> 
> If you’ve enjoyed reading this story, please leave me a comment or Kudos and let me know.


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